"i have a nagging creepy feeling that i'm living a life in someone else's reality - that the reality as i see now does not really belong to me. It's almost like that weird dream that you dream at night, only to wake up baffled and confused, knowing that you just dreamed someone else's dream,wondering what in the world was that all about... "

"Don't try to live a life that isn't yours."
"What if i were happy in that life..."
"Would you be?"
"Perhaps. Maybe not..."
"Are you happy now?"
"Somewhat. Not entirely."
"And why's that?"
"Perhaps i feel i dont quite fit in..."
"Would you like to fit in?"
"I'm not sure i can. i dont think it matters either way."
"You can't claim life that is not yours. You know this. You tried it once. It did not work..."
"What's mine then? Decadence?"
"Life of possibilities, as you once said..."
"The unknown, unpredictable, spontaneous, ridiculous, absurd, chaotic life?
Maybe that's the problem. Perhaps i believed for way too long that the only life i could legitimately claim was chaos..."